The Pleasures of Bankruptcy Read online

  “We wrestled together-I was trying to get him into a good position for a playful spanking, and he laughing and twisting to avoid being placed in that dangerous posture. I was accustomed to be quite lightly clad for the daily baths which I gave him-to which we both looked forward with a secret zest which should have warned me…”

  “If I observed that he seemed to be trying to rub his stiff little prick on my bare arm or leg as we struggled in our play, I would casually take it in my fingers and draw it aside-not rebuking him openly-but thinking that he would realize from my gesture that what he was doing was not quite nice.”

  “Quite frequently I would be wearing only a short chemise beneath my loose kimona or dressing gown- and slippers on my bare feet. Lester's muscles developed so rapidly after his thirteenth birthday that he often managed to pin me down on the bath mat-when he would sometimes find that an expanse of naked thigh or thighs had emerged from under my wrap and was available for that friction of his rigid little staff which so delighted him…”

  “These contacts-it becomes clearer to me now as I tell it to you-moved me more deeply than I then understood or, was willing to admit to myself.”

  “Longer and longer grew the periods during which I would appear to ignore what he was doing-but always, sooner or later, I would extend a rather shaky hand to take his stiff little prick and offer it the rebuke of being removed from contact with my bare skin.”

  “And I would endeavour to restore the innocence of the scene-and our mutual gaiety-for he grew silent and flushed as he rubbed his swollen, boyish prick on my denuded person, and I was in a somewhat similar state- by resuming our playful wrestling until I contrived to get him across my knees with his bare behind exposed to a merry paddling.”

  “And he seemed to get as much pleasure out of this posture as I did, wriggling and pressing his body down against my thighs until I could feel the quick throb of his youthful weapon against my bare legs, while my own chastising hand rose and fell on his tautly quivering little bottom till he cried for mercy.”

  “I could not bear to reproach him for these episodes. And I deliberately blinded myself to his increasing licentiousness-refusing to admit its existence, since with any reference to such things I would be unable to continue treating him as the child which in fact he no longer was-and thus would have to abandon our daily playtime of bathing and petting.”

  “Very soon now he achieved a boldness which required more than my nervous laughter to disguise. And if my kimona did not open of itself when we struggled on the rug, he would himself furtively contrive to open it.”

  “And under cover of our air of merriment, I would find all of my naked legs and thighs freed from their silken coverings. And while we rolled and wrestled together on the floor, Lester would seize the opportunity to press his loins, his immature genital bush and his now mature and excited member to my bare flesh wherever he chose-calves, thighs, even my bare feet-from which he had plucked the slippers.”

  “But this luxurious friction against my unclad body in which my son persisted in indulging whenever the chance arose-I dismissed mentally as merely a sensuous but not a sensual pleasure in soft, intimate contacts-such as a Persian kitten might have enjoyed in play.”

  “The day came, however, when the curtain was lifted in part from my obstinately blinded eyes, for when my late husband was dying he said to me:

  “Rose, my dear, if I have to leave you, I expect and hope that Lester will prove a great consolation to you. You are a healthy and passionate girl, and our bed will seem very empty to you during the long nights when you are alone. And if we had a daughter I would advise taking her to bed with you-to give you that companionship which is necessary to one who for years has been unaccustomed to sleeping alone.”

  “Yet this which I have in mind may well be better- and I advise that you should make a bedfellow of Lester. He looked at me deeply-and more meaningly than I then quite realized-in the eyes. I flushed deeply, though I had as yet no inkling of his true meaning. It was only later, when going through his diary-in which he had recorded bow he had several times watched-and with excited pleasure rather than the opposite-while I bathed Lester and handled him sexually, and the unseemly frolics that had ensued.”

  “So I was surprised-but not particularly agitated or at all ashamed when he continued:

  “Let me advise you, then, to take our son to your bed, in the event that I should not recover. You will thus he enabled to watch over his budding manhood-and even the snuggling together of your bodies and your hugs and warm kisses before going to sleep will be a source of pleasure and delight to both of you. I should not even deem it wrong if you lay naked thus, for these delicate little pleasures are as natural to mother and son as if there were no blood ties whatever, and it is only convention and prejudice which stamps them taboo.**

  “The boy must learn about womankind — and from whom can he learn it more tenderly than from his mother — and I feel sure that upon reflection you will agree with me, though I must warn you to be extremely careful lest any careless indiscretions on the part of Lester or yourself disclose any hint of your intimacies to the outside world.”

  “In spite of my amazement I tried to laugh-saying that I expected to keep my present bedfellow for many years to come. The fact that he set no bounds to what I might do with my sturdy young son-a sort of blanket absolution for incest-I dismissed mentally as due to his illness. And yet, Mr. Freeman, he had already set down in words what I was to read later.”

  “Lester is so ignorantly hot after his beautiful mother, and Rose does so love to touch his stiff young prick and feel it against her naked limbs, that I am surprised she has not long since drawn him between her opened legs — and so taken her full pleasure with him.”

  “It is a constant joy to me to watch them unseen during the bath hours. What a delightful sight it would be- this well-built boy and my handsome Rose with their naked bodies yoked in passionate sexual conflict.”

  “With the passing away of Mr. Bolton I did not adopt his strange if well meant suggestions. In the grief and the disarrangement of our daily lives I even abandoned the bathing and petting of the boy, who was now very nearly fourteen.”

  “But as the weeks passed-and I saw how disconsolate Lester became in the face of my gentle rebuffs to his demonstrative advances-as he pleaded that-'really he couldn't get at all his body when bathing alone'-I resumed my former habit of treating him as a child.”

  “I shall not easily forget his delight when I at last consented to bathe him once more. He was naked in a moment-and advancing towards me for a kiss and a hug before entering the tub-showing me a prick which did seem more formidable than I had ever seen it before- probably thus aroused by the fact of his nudity before me, and the prospect of a renewal of his former happy frolics.”

  “It appeared to me to be larger than his father's- a notion that so affected my senses that this bath became an essentially lascivious rite from its start to finish- having little or none of the carefree gaiety or tenderness with which I normally approached this maternal task.”

  “All the white softness of his supple young body was of interest to me now. My fingers trembled as they touched his round bottom-they shivered as they penetrated the crevice between his pink buttocks in my customary test of the effectiveness of the manner in which I had dried him after the bath.”

  “Lester sensed my nervous excitement. Both of us were unwonted silent and flushed. My breathing was hurried and my gaze kept wandering to the rigidity of the pink and uncapped shaft which sprang from what was by now a thick bush of sex hair.”

  “I tried to take myself in hand, to overcome my stupid self-consciousness. I managed to laugh as I prepared to handle that formidable cock-and to murmur shakily that 'this naughty thing is bigger than ever, Lester, and so much more arrogant! Whatever can be the matter with it-answer me?'”

  “It loves you, mother dear-and I guess it wants you to play with-“"he whispered in return.

  “
Already, while he was lying or standing in the tub, I had sponged and soaped those very demonstrative and disturbing genitals and had afterwards run a towel over them. But as the moment came for the 'finger drying' to which I had accustomed him, I was devoured by both eagerness and dread-dread of not being able to control myself to the decency which in these handlings I had been wont to show.”

  “I seized the bull by the horn, so to speak-clenching my teeth in the determination to overcome this morbid desire of mine which sought to evict the innocence that I had thought presided over these functions.”

  “And instantly, Mr. Freeman, I was in flames of passion-oh… pity ray womanly weakness-don't scorn me — I'm so ashamed, and you have made me tell you all these dreadful things.”

  “There, there, dear lady,” he soothed her. “Don't worry so-be confiding-certain that I admire you more than ever…”

  He gently stroked a lovely bare arm, and then the nape of her softly rounded neck. He was murmuring words which she could scarcely hear. To her surprise, the agitated Rose found herself liking the man-this brusque business man-who had never before seemed to her capable of attracting a genuine affection or of lavishing one.

  That even now, in her confession, she was acting under what had been a cruel compulsion, did not seem any longer to cause her any detestation of Francis Freeman. And through the tears that filled her great dark eyes she glanced flushedly up into his face. It seemed almost to be tender-and not with the assumed benevolence which sometimes masked it.

  That he was interested in hearing the narrative of her shame he made no attempt to conceal. His gray eyes glowed into hers with a fervor that caused her eyes to fall. She trembled a little-and discovered to her amazement, that he had drawn her head to his shoulder-and that she was letting it remain there-and allowing him to smooth her reddened cheeks very gently.

  “You are interesting me immensely, dear lady, with your candid story,” he murmured.

  “It… it's a very wicked story,” she whispered. “But I beg you to believe that I didn't realize its real and underlying wickedness until my relations with Lester-all of a sudden-were right out in the open.”

  “It's all a part of life,” he replied. “And from life there is no escape but death.”

  He was gently caressing a round, firm breast now, through the thin silk of her dress. Rose moved uneasily — shamed by the increasing familiarities which she was tolerating. Weakly she struggled to sit upright-but the arm about her neck declined to allow this. With a little sigh she permitted her head to be pillowed once more. But she whispered-

  “Please, Mr. Freeman…”

  “Pay no attention,” he said. “You are overwrought, and need to be soothed and consoled.”

  The handsome, flushed woman breathed deeply, panted a little. It had been so long since a marauding hand had petted her sensitive bosom-not since her husband's sad death had she known anything like this.

  From one swelling hillock to the other the caressing hand moved-petting very gently. And the man murmured “I dislike to hear you accusing yourself of wickedness, Rose, my dear…”

  She trembled perceptibly at the increased familiarity of his address. Her lips opened-and closed again, as she sighed and yielded to the soothing yet infinitely exciting fingers which moved upon her breasts.

  “You see it was not really wickedness,” continued his low voice. “It was perfectly natural that both you and Lester should have felt as you did-as your husband had hinted…”

  As a finger pressed lightly but persistently upon first one and then the other of her taut nipples… which thrust up through her thin garments-Rose thrilled to his cool audacity. She was inspired now to confide in him fully-even to shock him, if that were possible-to titillate his senses by the fullness of her confession even as he was titillating hers by his soft caresses.

  “But it was wicked, surely?” she whispered in a shamed little voice, “when I took my son's-balls-in one hand… as I did on the night I was telling you about-and deliberately let my other hand stray caressingly up and down his swollen prick!”

  She heard him gasp over her gratifying bold words as well as over the mental picture of the scene which see had portrayed. He steadied his voice before replying.

  “A lascivious gesture certainly-yet innocent in the sense that it was prompted by nature. And then…”

  “Lester quivered from head to foot-looking at me with eyes shining with delight as well as surprise. Never before had I permitted myself to handle him with such an outspoken sexual caress. But even as I shivered with desire-I shrank back with shame as I realized what I was doing. I abandoned my fingerings-and retreated on my knees as he advanced… holding out to me temptingly his throbbing, rigid cock.”

  “Mother is not quite herself tonight,” I stammered. “She didn't intend to do what she did then. She was just playing.”

  “Ohh! It felt so marvelous!” he whispered. “Please do it again, mother darling-just once!”

  “I shook my head. But when I saw him grasp his rod and as I had done, try to duplicate upon it the caresses I had given it, I started forward in alarm.”

  “Never, never do that, Lester!” I cried. “You will make me very sorry that I ever played with you. You could injure yourself by such experiments. Promise me that you will never-pet yourself-in that way, when you are alone…”

  “Somewhat startled by my earnestness, he promised what I had begged. And I made ms if to rise to my feet My light negligee opened in front-and a naked thigh was disclosed. I covered it hastily as I saw the gleam in his eye. But I was too late, for he threw himself upon me with the utmost impetuosity, eager for the frolic he so much desired.”

  “He was laughing merrily as he groped for a leg hold by which he might throw me to the rug in our customary game. Realizing my own distracted state of mind I attempted to dissuade him-but he overbore me gaily- and I found that I was laughing too-a bit nervously… as I wriggled and twisted to evade him.”

  “It was, I told myself, a restoration of the spirit of un-contaminated fun-and showed that Lester had thought but lightly of the somewhat perverse and prolonged caress which I had given him. My own spirits were thus raised, and we rolled and wrestled together on the mat with gasps of mirth. And yet, in fact, both Lester and myself were on a hair trigger of sensuality.”

  “At the beginning of our romp he had managed to free almost all of my hips and thighs from the loose and flowing negligee which I was wearing. Beneath this was only the brief chemise which I had adopted for daily wear-for the dainty panties accompanying them had been taken off-as was usual when I disrobed before giving the lad his bath.”

  “My naked son was all over me in an instant. His power seemed phenomenal. His obvious intention was to pin my shoulders to the mat-a wrestler's triumph. But in the process of thus pinning me down he was writhing upon me supposedly for the foregoing purpose-and his bare belly and swollen prick were taking full toll and pasturage on my naked thighs-thus amply at his disposal…”

  “I was vibrating and thrilling intimately again. And my laughter was forced and almost hysterical-a mantle of sound to make me appear unaware of the licentious contact which was thrilling me more than it had ever done before-and to disguise also that I was in no hurry this time to dislodge his stiff member from contact with my nudity as I had always done very hurriedly on the other instances.”

  “He had me almost flattened out beneath him. Admiring his boyish strength. I had no particular aversion to my defeat-and letting him plant me flat. But what changed my views all of a sudden was the fact that Lester had contrived to place himself right between my naked thighs. His smooth young body was instinctively gripped by them as he bore my torso down towards the floor- while his loins, armed and preceded by that stiff weapon of his-were pushing nervously upward.”

  “If the smooth knob of that rampant virility was searching for an even more intimate part of my body in which to nestle, it had almost succeeded in finding it. For his prick had burrowed li
ghtly beneath my chemise, and already I could feel the hard, warm head of his weapon up against my naked crotch.”

  “I gave a hoarse, muffled little cry as I realized the imminence of the danger-a danger which chiefly lay in the throbbing desire within me to allow him to continue until the mystery of the flesh was a mystery to him no longer…”

  “Stricken with the fear that my senses might betray me at any moment into guiding the blind instincts of my son and enable him to attain his sensual ends, I recommenced to struggle. Writhing and twisting frantically I freed my legs from their attractive burden, and wriggling beneath the boy's detaining arms I suddenly found myself upon my face.”

  “He pounced upon me again-holding me down. I was panting for breath… not even conscious that one naked buttock had emerged from my tangled negligee during our struggle. My son was seated on my back-resting, as I supposed, though he was strangely silent. And then he bent forward-and I knew from his warm breath on my bare flesh that his whole attention was centered on my nude mound.”

  “I reached a hand backward to repair the disorder, but he was before me in my attempt. With a little cry of delight he snatched both negligee and chemise up to the small of my back and pounded with a cry of ecstasy upon my naked bottom.”

  “Oh! Ohh! It's so lovely-it's wonderful, mother- your bottom…” he panted. “Let me-ohh, let me- play with it a little while. Don't move… oh, please!”

  “Lester. Lester! Your hands-you're too old… you mustn't touch me there-it isn't nice!” I wailed hoarsely. “Ohh! You mustn't-indeed you mustn't!”

  “But I was trembling under the fervor of his attack and his wild delight. I seemed so weak-unable to order him or enforce my commands. And now he seemed absolutely crazy with excitement as he moulded the soft flesh.”